|
| When I first opened a xanga account, a lot of my friends said I wouldn't be able to keep up a daily or even a weekly blog with my schedule. Its not that they were being discouraging, they were only speaking out of personal experience. I was out to prove them wrong but have come to an opposite conclusion. They were right... Life has been crazy lately and I feel like a whole different person since I first opened my account which wasn't long ago. School, work, extra curricular activities, laziness... These are the things that consume my time. Anyways, I just wanted to get on and write something; even if it was meaningless. | | |
| For those of you who dont know, I work in the Physical Medicine department of a hospital here in Fayetteville. In the past four months Ive been there, Ive been exposed to some of the most joyous events, as well as some of the most tragic events. Death has become something I experience every day Im there- now a normality. This past weekend, I experienced something like never before. It was heartbreaking, yet so warm and uplifting at the same time. One of our PT's was assigned to treat a patient who was recovering from femoral deep vein thrombosis (DVT) and a ventriculostomy. Deep vein thrombosis is a condition in which a major blood clot forms in a vessel and can eventually explode causing fatality. A ventriculostomy is a procedure where a hole is drilled into the skull, in the frontal lobe, and a tube is inserted to drain liquid from the dividing hemisphere in the brain. Anyways, this patient hadnt been to the dentist in nearly fifteen years and went after his wife and mother convinced him too. While in the chair, the dentist noticed a large abscess in one of his teeth that had made its way up to his brain. The dentist ended up draining almost 3 oz. of puss from this patients brain. Of course, he was brought into the hospital to be treated. While in the hospital, he developed DVT in his right femoral region (the major artery in the leg). The physician went in and had to slice open the femur in order to relieve pressure and unclot the artery. The patients DVT ended up causing some nerve damage which could be a problem later on as far as function with his right leg... So heres where we get to the main point of the story. Over 50% of all DVT's that breakout are fatal. This guy was really lucky. When I went in to assist in treating him, his wife and little daughter were present. This guy was awesome! He was fairly young and had a dry but great sense of humor. We went to get him up, taking our time to allow him to get his bearing. As we stood him up, you could see the pain in his eyes and his face. His pain diddnt get in the way of what he knew he had to do- to get up and start applying weight to his bad leg. As he stood, the atmosphere in the room became tense. Tense and emotional. I looked over at his wife and daughter. His wife was looking him dead in the eye; I could tell. She saw the pain in his face... You could see in her face that she was thinking about all her family had been through the past three days. She was thinking about the first time she met him, when he proposed to her, their wedding, the birth of their first child. I could see it all in her eyes. You should of seen the way she looked at this guy. As she began to tear up, she lost herself in his eyes. She looked at this man as if he meant everything in the world to her; like there was no one or nothing else. I couldnt help but to tear up myself. It was just so... Heartbreaking yet so incredible. I looked back away from her and focused back on what I was doing. We laid him back in bed and left the room. This event has been on my mind ever since. I can only hope to have what this man has in his life. A wife who loves me and cares for me unconditionally. For me to be that one person in her life and for her to be that on person in mine. For her to have that look. The look in her eyes... | | |
| Dudeman, life is so weird. Nothing pops up when your looking for it; but always pops up when your completely oblivious to it. Maybe I should stop looking for a billion dollars. All I have for now. | | |
| JOURNEYS "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." - Ralph Waldo Emerson INSIGHT "A moment's insight is sometimes worth a life's experience." - Oliver Wendell Holmes CHALLENGES "Unless a man undertakes more than he possibly can do, he will never do all that he can." - Henry Drummond THE DOER "It is time for us to stand and cheer for the doer, the achiever, the one who recognizes the challenge and does something about it." - Vince Lombardi PERSEVERANCE "Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish." - John Quincy Adams GOD "Without the Way there is no going; without the Truth there is no knowing; without the Life there is no living." -Thomas A Kempis "Only God can fully satisfy the hungry heart of man." -Hugh Black | | |
| Wow! Its been since August the last time I wrote anything. Life has just been so... Busy. School, work, and Erin are where all of my time go. Oh, Erin- she is the wonderful girl Im dating. We met in our Nutrition in Health class; she kinda had my attention the first time I saw her (just dont tell her that). Erin is great. I have fun with her and she makes me smile. Tonight, Im going with her to our first ADPi Function together; it should be awesome. Life lately, has been, well "blah" as someone I know puts it. I thought things would get better with CRU and they havnt so Im leaving. My walk is no where near where it should be but Im... okay with that. A part of me doesnt care, the other part is waiting on Him to pick me up. I know its bad when my brother, who Isnt a beleiver and whom Ive been praying for a long time now, emails me and encourages me to read through Hebrews 10. I should be the one encouraging him to look at scripture. One of many examples on where I am now. For the first time, my flesh has consumed me and nothing matters. My walk, witness, thoughts, actions... I really dont care at this point. Dont get me wrong. My heart is definitely to be where I was. Im just okay right now where I am. Ive been in a fire fight with an enemy who is stronger in both numbers and power. We're out of food and water and havnt slept in days. My guys are all either wounded or dead. Im told help is on its way, but its been too long now and hope has faded. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, I'm done. For the first time, I cant pick up my weapon and fire. I cannot fight the fight. The enemy is advancing now and soon I will be held their captive. A fine soldier Ive made... | | |
|
